Perfectly swishy costumes, just slightly faded/ worn/ misused? Check.
Twisted storyline with an over the top, unbelievable premise? Check.
I HAD TO SEE THIS. Seriously, I was waiting for this one for a year.
Oh, as a bonus, buckets and buckets and pails and gallon drums and tanker truck loads of red paint. Blood fest. I'm not usually into horror movies. Let me clarify that: I can't watch horror movies. I made an exception for Burton's Sleepy Hollow, which is just gorgeous to look at. Mostly. I didn't care in this case though, because The List was so perfectly filled. I will sit through the bloodbath if Tim Burton started it. Good lord I hope he never tries his hand at reality TV. hahahaha.
And did I mention that this is a MUSICAL?!
Well that changed everything for me. Seriously. How can I have nightmares about the slashing of some poor fella's throat if the person doing the slashing is singing about it?
I knew the basic premise of SWEENEY TODD but hadn't seen it or knew how it ended. It is a twisted tale of a wrongful conviction, of unrequited love and dirty old men, and a lust for murderous revenge. It is also a nighmarish cautionary tale about personal grooming and questionable eating establishments.
So extremely, very much, unpleasant.
I was not disappointed. Johnny Depp carried this role of beautifully, and I'm not just saying that because he could read the phone book and I'd gush about how nuanced his performance was. He's tortured inside, and he is relishing his own pain. He's absolutely blinded by it. You can imagine that he's so consumed with revenge that he might not fully remember anymore what started it, just that he will have vengeance!!!
It's earned him an Oscar nomination.
Is it possible that a movie about a murderous plot can be so beautiful to look at? The light is handled so perfectly, and there's not much light to go around. It's dark, shadowy, like a photograph taken a century ago and left in an attic to fade. Every detail is perfect, right down the slime on the bricks, the stubble on Alan Rickman's face and the grunge in Mrs Lovett's disgusting pie shop.
I was stunned by all the texture: cracked leather, rippled glass windows, dusty floors. What a visual experience.
The movie is all dark, faded, wet gloom, designed in black and shades of grey with a few recurring splashes of red: blood, Mrs Lovett's dirty crimson dresses. The few jolts of colour are shocking. Todd's first victim is a peacock flash of bright blue; he doesn't last long. Mrs Lovett's fantasy scene is a bleached out and pale vision of what would have been a sunshine and brightness.
May I just say that I love Helena Bonham Carter. It's like this role was made for her face. May I also say that Alan Rickman is the most perfect elegant villain in his opulent clothes and oily voice.
The songs are really the skeleton of the movie. I know this whole mess was originally a very successful Broadway play, but having never been to Broadway, didn't know the music at all. These are some jaunty, catchy, well written songs! They have stuck in my head weeks later, and not in that annoying teen-diva kind of way. Best of all, the songs were delivered with fierce scenery chewing expression. It looked perfectly right that Mr Todd and Mrs Lovett should break into song when discussing their murderous plans.
Now I don't know if we were supposed to laugh, and it's quite possible that we deeply offended the other eight people cringing in the dark theatre, but we followed every horrified cringe with an uncomfortable laugh. It was all just so extreme. Gush, pour, splat!!! We doubled over and groaned with idiotic grins on our faces.
Wow. Eye popping! Lovesick conniving! Striped stockings! Those angry creases between Mr Todd's eyebrows!
We left the theatre feeling a little bit lightheaded and sick to our stomachs. Especially Jethro. I grew up watching various veterinarian procedures being performed, all of which involved some blood. My townie husband can't deal with it. He was a little green.
We couldn't stop talking about it all the way home. Jethro didn't see the ending coming. He was pretty disgusted. But couldn't stop talking about what a great movie it is.
There's something special about entertainment that slaps you across the face with repulsion but leaves you thinking that you can't wait to see it again. You wanna know something though? I don't think it would have been the same if anybody else had been involved in it.
I'd love to hear some opinions on this nasty little piece of work...
Welcome everybody! Hunker down with your popcorn and whatever refreshing beverage you've chosen, and enjoy the show!
Lots of stuff happened in 2007 but really, over here in this neck of the woods it's all about what entertained us. Let's take a look...and hand out some MAJOR AWARDS!!
THE "BEST MOST PERFECT ALBUM OF THE YEAR" AWARD goes to...
Watch the video- lots of long blonde hair, big grins, and T Bone Burnett rockin out! I think I need to borrow her dress and boots for my next big real life awards show.
THE "I LOVED IT BUT JETHRO THOUGHT IT SHOULD SOUND BETTER" AWARD goes to...
The White Stripes, Icky Thump.
Jethro was disappointed in the sound of the record. He has really high standards, is consistently disappointed by what's hitting the air and the store shelves, and has always trusted our man Jack White to make a good sounding record for him. He took it pretty hard. Digs the songs though. Me, I still love Jack White. Pretty much unconditionally.
THE "NOT JUST FOR MALLPUNKS, MOMMY LOVES IT TOO" AWARD goes to...
FAMOUS LAST WORDS by Hedley.
The song in this here video also qualifies this band for THE "I CAN'T BELIEVE I LIKE THIS BALLAD" AWARD. Good job, boys!!
THE "BEST COUNTRY SONG" as well as JETHRO'S "HOT IN A CRAZY SCORNED ANGRY CHICK KIND OF WAY" AWARD goes to...
Carrie Underwood.
I don't generally condone violence against pickup trucks. Jethro doesn't usually dig blondes. But hot damn.
And now, THE "GOOD THING WE ALL STILL LIKE EACH OTHER" AWARD will be shared by the following acts, because this was a huge year for REUNION TOURS!!
The Police got back together!
I didn't see it. I am so ashamed of myself for not even catching the Grammy Awards this year. Shame.
Van Halen got back together!
Well, sort of. Michael Anthony split, and without him...I mean, he's so underrated! When I want my Van Halen, I want the crashing cymbals, I want the shredding brownsound guitar, and the arrogant, tongue-in-cheek borderline comedic frontman...and I want the rock solid bass and sweet background harmonies! I miss Mike. I have no doubt young Wolfgang can do the job- he grew up with it after all- but you know, Edward has been known to fire bandmates...although he has kept his brother around for over twenty years...
Regardless, I didn't see anything on YouTube worth sharing. I refuse to post a link because why should all of our hearts be broken? I'd rather put on my Van Halen II cassette and be happy. For what it's worth, Diamond Dave was short haired, high foreheaded, white toothed, leather clad, and awesome. Gotta have a bright point here.
Rage Against The Machine got back together!
I didn't see it. I would have loved to. I would have taken the kids too. Except for the crowds and all that, y'know. But seriously. Rage. They are just as relevant now as they were 10-15 years ago.
So I wasn't there, but from what I dug up on the intermittent net, they were awesome. TimCom with his terrifying tattoos and massive arms, Fender P-Bass up under his pits! Crazy Zack with his afro! Morello arming the homeless with mystifying moves and his guitar jammed up even higher under his pits! Cute little Brad Wilk behind the kit keeping the whole thing on track!
I hope there's a DVD coming. I can only hope.
And the really big news...
Led Zeppelin got back together.
Sort of. As much as physically possible without the late great John Bonham.
I wasn't there.
Don't even get me started. I couldn't go. Even if I could have, I couldn't have. I might have spontaneously combusted. Or exploded. Or imploded. Dangerous. Better to stay home and imagine what could have been. Trust me.
The next day, our YouTube search had Jethro and me alternately groaning and shivering at the magnificence of the Best Band In The World Ever...even if the Bonzo was the Junior version.
Here...complete with the big screen and feedback squeals...
It's as close as some of us will ever get.
Even with some dooooode hollerin along with it, all captured on somebody's crappy little cellphone, you get how awesome this must have been...
And like I said I wasn't there. In my dreams.
THE "JUSTIN HAWKINS FALSETTO" AWARD goes to the young chap who's also the recipient of the 'THERE WILL ONLY EVER BE ONE FREDDY MERCURY BUT SOMETIMES WE GET A LIVE ONE" AWARD:
Now you all know I pretty much live under a rock. Who is this person??? Where did he come from? Lebanon? Paris? London? All of the above? I don't normally listen to pop but this catchy tune has a vocal that slapped me upside the head. Kaching is right, baby!
I read a lot this past year. I read for education- to see what's being published these days- and I read for the pure joy of it. There were a lot of good books in 2007.
THE "BOOK THAT BLEW MY MIND" AWARD goes to...
ANTHEM OF A RELUCTANT PROPHET by Joanne Proulx.
Oh looky here, a video...
A 17 year old smart mouth slacker with too much smarts for his own good suffers from death premonitions and missing girl posters while skateboarding around his nasty little town. Blood, death, religion, sex, White Stripes and Red Hot Chili Peppers. All the good stuff.
THE "BEAUTIFUL EXPERIENCE" AWARD goes to...THE INVENTION OF HUGO CABRET by Brian Selznick.
Watch this!
THE "BEST KID BOOK THAT ANYBODY WITH A TWISTED SENSE OF HUMOUR CAN LOVE" AWARD goes to...
ALEX AND THE IRONIC GENTLEMAN by Adrienne Kress!
It's freaky deaky cheeky fun with healthy dash of darkness....that agreeable combination that a parent and kids can all enjoy together!
THE "MEMOIR THAT COULD CHANGE THE WORLD" AWARD goes to
PRISONER OF TEHRAN by Marina Nemat
Honestly I was afraid to read this book. She was imprisoned as a teenager and tortured. I am so glad I read it though, because ultimately it is a story of hope. It's the story of a fierce independence that will not be silenced. It's about peace. Read it.
THE "PARANORMAL ROMANCE, VAMPIRE WEREWOLF LOVE TRIANGLE" AWARD goes to...
ECLIPSE by Stephenie Meyer.
Are you kidding me? Edward may be physically perfect, educated, elegant, intelligent, freakishly strong, gentlemanly, musically talented, did I mention physically perfect- male model- gorgeous? But, like, cold, dude, and control freak much? Like, I'd totally take the ginormous 6' 7" brown skinned, black haired, funny, daredevil, sweetheart innocent minded hot skinned puppy dog native kid from the reservation up the road, any day. Did I mention 107 degrees hot? Literally, Jacob Black is hot. Bella is, like, such a drip. Can't stand the sight of blood and she's gonna marry a vampire. Duh. I cannot wait to see what Jacob's gonna do in the next book!!!!
THE "BITTERSWEET IT'S OVER" AWARD goes to...
HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS by JK Rowling. Call me sappy but I cried all the way through it. Yeah, it really frustrated me in places. But where it excelled, it was amazing. Dobby, Snape, the Weasleys. Was the epilogue cheesy? Yeah. But look at it this way: after all the drama, a dash of peaceful normality was kinda nice.
THE "HEARTWARMING UPLIFTING TRAGICOMEDY TRIUMPH" AWARD goes to...
LOTTERY by Patricia Wood.
A) No matter who you are, you should read this book. B) Who do you consider a hero? C) Who are your real friends and family? D) Does money really matter? E) Does intelligence really matter? F) These characters are gems.
THE "DAMAGED HERO" AWARD goes to...
UNDERCOVER PROTECTOR by Molly O'Keefe. I don't actually read much romance, but if you want to learn how to put together a plot, I suggest checking it out. A romantic hero has to have some emotional flaw that gives our heroine a challenge, but this hero is damaged physically as well. He's also charming, funny, and complex- everything to make a reader cheer for him. Plus, this is one gritty little story.
THE "LAUGH, CRY AND FEEL GOOD BY THE END" AWARD goes to...
THE PENNY TREE by Holly Kennedy. I don't want to say too much about the plot because I don't want to give it away! I will say that the heroine's strange predicament- an anonymous admirer posts ads in the paper looking for her- adds up to some comedic moments, culminating in a surprise twist and yes, a couple of nose tingly teary moments. She's good that way.
THE "I ONLY GO SEE ESCAPIST FANTASY AT THE MOVIE THEATRE" AWARD goes to...
Me!
THE "MICHELLE PFEIFFER ROCKS AND I WANT A GOAT CHARIOT" AWARD goes to...
Stardust!
THE "GREAT VISUALS, THOSE KIDS ARE REALLY GROWING UP, AND ALAN RICKMAN RULES" AWARD goes to...
Harry Potter And The Order of the Phoenix
THE "CONVOLUTED SWAGGERING RIDICULONG" AWARD, THE "I DON'T CARE I STILL LOVE IT" AWARD, AND THE "JOHNNY DEPP COULD READ THE PHONE BOOK AND I'D WATCH" AWARD goes to...
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
It is also the recipient of THE "I LOVE BRITISH MEN" AWARD (well that's obvious) as well as THE "I LOVE AUSTRALIAN MEN" AWARD
THE "KEEF IS WICKED COOL" AWARD
THE "EYE CANDY BEST PRESENTED COVERED IN GRIME" AWARD
as well as THE "SERIES OF AWESOME LINES AND GREAT SCENES HELD TOGETHER BY A MOSTLY CRAP MOVIE" AWARD.
Oh and I almost forgot- THE "DAMN YOU, SHE SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN HER OWN SHIP, SHE'S THE BIGGEST PIRATE OF EM ALL" AWARD. In other words, don't stick around for the epilogue after the credits.
Oh I almost forgot to forget- THE "JERRY BRUCKSPLOSION PYRO AWARD FOR EXCELLENCE IN BLOWING S*** UP" AWARD! That pretty much goes without saying, really.
THE "WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH ME THAT I MISSED THIS" AWARD goes to...
Me, again.
There was a BRAD PITT COWBOY MOVIE and I did not see it.
Seriously, what was I thinking????
The scenery looks so bleak and beautiful. Never mind that I pretty much know how the story ends...
THE "BEST MOVIE OF 2007 THAT I HAVEN'T SEEN" AWARD goes to...
Sweeney Todd. It showed up here just a week before the year ended...and I haven't been able to get out of the house to see it. Damn you, music industry! Let Jethro go! Unshackle him! I don't want to go see it alone because it's all, like, scary and stuff. Bloooooody! But so stylin...
But you know how I feel about Tim Burton. You know this. All the still shots are gorgeous- dark, shadowed, with a palette of black and grey and crimson. Just beautiful. Some of my favourite actors are in this film! Johnny! Helena! Alan Rickman!!!
I have to sweet talk somebody into seeing this movie with me!
Best of all, high point of my year, favourite award here...
THE "RECORDING ENGINEER OF THE YEAR/ GUY I LOVE THE MOST IN THE WHOLE WORLD" AWARD goes to...
Sometimes an album comes along that is so different, so unique and so darn special that it keeps you coming back for another listen, over and over. This is the one.
The first thing that sets it apart is the unexpected collaboration. He's a 59 year old heavy metal pioneer who was one of the first great archetypal rock stars. She's a 36 year old bluegrass artist who sings, writes, plays fiddle and produces.
Together, they've made a record that spans decades and moods and never turns out like you expect, and yet, it makes so much sense that I find myself wondering why this didn't happen sooner!
The most important thing for my recording engineer husband is that THIS RECORD SOUNDS SO GOOD. You can thank T Bone Burnett for that. The band is solid and everything sounds right. This record has passed the following tests: -the Jethro test -the Jetta test -the dining room test -the iPod test
I'm not worried about the Grandma test...when I told my mom about this record she brightened up and said, "Oh. I like Robert Plant." I tried not to show it but I was kinda floored. I had no idea! After twenty years of me going on and on about this guy, and now she fesses up!
As for the Papa test...My ol man LOVES harmonies. He loves to sing it and listen to it. We played a couple of songs for him, resulting in a smile and "Mm hmm!" which is the seal of approval from this guy.
Seriously, if you appreciate harmony, this is it. Plant has stated in interviews that Krauss taught him how to sing.
!!!!
He hadn't ever sung harmony with another singer. He'd recorded a part above his own melody part but this was very different.
And does he ever sound good. He's dropped the rock god persona, and just sings beautifully. As for Alison Krauss, I have never heard her sound anything but gorgeous and she does not disappoint.
It's quite spine tingling how well their voices work together.
What I really love is that you are never really sure what time or era this all takes place in. There's something old sounding about it, evoking visions of sunlight streaming into a dusty room where two musicians pluck strings and sing...like you aren't even supposed to be there to hear it. But it's also modern- polished, perfected, professional.
It's not bluegrass...it's not rock...it's not country.
It's...
Unexpected? Awesome.
Bottom line, what counts more than anything else in music, the SONGS are excellent.
With this glowing review you'd think I knew somebody who worked on it. I don't. However, I do know somebody who wishes he'd had a chance to be a part of this record!
I should have told you about this book two months ago when I read it! Why am I so behind????
I think you should read this. I don't care who you are- read this special gem of a book. It's a great concept, well written, will make you laugh out loud and weep like you don't care who's watching, and most of all, will make you really care about the characters in the story!
The official blurb: "Perry’s IQ is only 76, but he’s not stupid. His grandmother taught him everything he needs to know to survive: She taught him to write things down so he won’t forget them. She taught him to play the lottery every week. And, most important, she taught him whom to trust. When Gram dies, Perry is left orphaned and bereft at the age of thirty-one. Then his weekly Washington State Lottery ticket wins him 12 million dollars, and he finds he has more family than he knows what to do with..."
The triumphant accomplishment here is the VOICE. You are getting this story through the experience of Perry L Crandall, and you will never doubt him for a second. The author, Patricia Wood, is a 50 year old woman who lives on a boat in Hawaii, has been in the army, is a PhD student, professional horsewoman, and generally sharp perky person! Imagine how she got so perfectly into the skin of this character, who insists that he is not retarded. He's slow, but not retarded. There is a difference, and by the end of this book, you'll know it.
It ends up being a study in human behaviour- both the best and the worst. I gobbled it up and couldn't put it down. Highly recommended!
I JUDGE BOOKS BY THEIR COVERS. There. I said it. How could I walk past any of these in a library or a store and not want to read them?
There's more to it than that, though. Being the mother of a 13 year old girl, I want to know what my kid is reading. Even more than that, as a writer who hopes to publish a peer to these three books, I need to what's out there.
Above all, there is some excellent stuff out there. You should never let the "Young Adult" label scare you away. Many of these books are proving to be crossover successes, and some are shelved in two sections. Why wouldn't you read Young Adult fiction even if you're over 21? You were once a kid, were you not?
Earlier this summer I read THE POSSIBILITY OF FIREFLIES by Dominique Paul.
I was drawn to it because it's set in 1987, which was a very good year for me, and because the main character's love interest is a fledgling rock star. Well here's the catch- and you know there must always be a catch because otherwise there's no reason to read- Ellie is a 14 year old kid who keeps getting locked out of the house because Mom's out partying...and Leo is TWENTY.
Yep. Ick factor. I had to know how this was all going to play out.
This is a beautifully written story. The author got the details right and created a few characters that will feel instantly familiar. The hero of the story does prove to be a hero, but that's all I'll say.
What I loved about this book was the sense of hopefulness. Even though this kid is in a neglectful and mentally abusive situation, she never gives up.
What I didn't love about this book was the incredible sense of self awareness. Ellie is almost believable as an extremely sensitive and intelligent girl, but I couldn't help but feel, as a chick who was there, doing that, at that time, that the awareness was filtered through a mind that has had time to look back.
One other thing sort of bugged me. I couldn't figure out exactly why the story was set in 1987. The parties and rock stars? Because it was a good year for hair metal? Because it was exactly twenty years before the publication of the book? Because the author was a kid then? I suspected that this may have been a partially autobiographical story, especially after reading the acknowledgments. This worries me. I have a nice little raw novel waiting to be seen, and it is not an autobiography. I made it up. It's fiction. However, we, as readers, always want to associate the writer with the written. I was doing that as I read this book. I want to think that an author knows, from experience, exactly what she is talking about, because it makes the fictional story more believable. However, I don't want a thinly disguised version of what really happened. I suspected that Dominique Paul changed the names and called it a story...and I fear that it'll be suspected of me too.
This was a valuable lesson for me as a writer. I have to tell a new story, not my own. I can use my own story for a starting block but it can't be my life (and it isn't.) Most of all, because I set mine in a similar time period, I have to make sure it's for a reason. If there's no significance to that date, it might as well be set in the present. (There are reasons for setting it in the 80s, besides just liking the tunes of the time!)
I'm willing to forgive it, because it's a good solid little book. Despite the nasty life situation that our heroine is in, it's a sweet story. Ellie is likeable, and by the end, you'll be cheering for her to overcome her troubles. I even squeezed out a few sobs for her. You're gonna be okay, Ellie!!!
A little internet digging told me that Dominique Paul, who is a screenwriter, will be directing the feature film. How's that for a first time novelist? I think it'll make an excellent movie. The things that bugged me won't show up. Only the triumphant story will come through. Mothers who partied like rock stars twenty years ago can take their daughters to see it. Whether they sit together or not will be entirely up to them...
Soon after, I read EXIT HERE by Jason Myers.
Again, the author claims to have lived the life and knew guys like the main character. The author lived to tell about it, which is more than can be said for a few of the kids in the story.
This is an absolutely harrowing story. Every one of the college age characters is shallow, self centred, materialistic, and rude. They live by their cell phones. They lie to each other. Their friendships are based on who's got the best drugs and whose pants are most likely to come off. I couldn't help but wonder....is this really what it's like to be a young urban American today?
I have to say, this book never breaks character. The voice of Travis is believable because it is unwavering. He and all of his friends are consistently unlikeable. In fact, they are all so shallow, they all sound alike.
Many times I closed the book and considered not opening it again. But I did. I kept on reading. I had to know what drove Travis, and would he decide to leave the hollow life of partying and drugging and hooking up? I had to know what the deal was with his ex-girlfriend. I had to know what the hell happened in Hawaii.
Jason Myers wisely dropped little clues into the story. It seemed to be nothing more than a diary of endless clubs and bathrooms and living rooms and text messages, but the mystery catches up with the reader almost unaware. And then you're caught and you have to know.
My picky picky problem is that by halfway in, I got sick of the constant band references. It got to sounding like the author wanted to name drop every band he's heard of in the last five years. However, it made sense. It suited the vibe of the story and most of all, suited the personalities involved. It's all about who you know.
The ending is basically the only one it could be. It is not happy. But it's the only outcome it could have. If you're looking for a gritty story, and you've got a strong stomache, read this.
The best one of the bunch was not even shelved in the Young Adult section of the bookstore. ANTHEM OF A RELUCTANT PROPHET by Joanne Proulx is one of the best books I've read this year. And, the cover is just gorgeous. This little photo doesn't show the details so you'll have to trust me on it. I'm including it in the list of teen fiction because I do think there are teenagers that are ready for a book this heavy.
I couldn't find a flaw in this novel. The voice is perfect, the hero is typical teenage sarcasm on the outside and accurate sensitivity on the inside. The cultural details are right. This book touches on death, love, fear, religion, sexuality, drugs, alienation, identity.
There is some imagery in this book that could break your heart. I wept several times. Not that weeping is the criteria for a good novel, or even that it's hard to squeeze tears out of me, but honestly, parts of this book are painfully beautiful. That's it's told from the point of view of a 17 year old boy makes it more touching.
But here's the thing- it's funny. Luke says one thing while thinking another and it's like comedic subtitles flashing in front of your eyes.
Joanne Proulx has taken a highly unlikely premise- a kid has death premonitions- and makes it totally believable. It's because of the perfect voice of Luke Hunter, the classic smart kid posing as a slacker in order to ease his overworking mind.
It's a painful subject. The death of a friend has a horrible impact on these kids, especially on the one who casually predicted it.
Again, here I am associating the writer and the written...but it must be said that this book, told in first person by a teenage boy, was written by an adult woman. And she got it. She totally nailed it. I've never been a teenage boy myself, but I believed every word.
I highly recommend this book. (and not just because I'm supporting my fellow Canadians!)
All three of these are debut novels. And each author thanked their agent...
I ride, I read, I write. I share my life with a husband, two teenagers, a Pug, a scary house cat, and three horses. Pink is my favourite colour. I used to hate it but then my brain got rearranged and now I like it so much I sometimes dye my hair pink. I'm slightly crazy and I believe we should all stop saying crazy like it's a bad thing. I write novels - like as in, I start them and actually finish them - and I fully intend to be a published author. I teach people how to ride horses for a living, and I love my job! All I ever wanted to do was ride my ponies and write my stories. Hey, that's what I do! Lucky, lucky me. Join me for horses, trucks, Johnny Depp, antidepressants, beer, trashy pop culture, interior desecrating, Jesus, John Deere, and rock stars. Yeeaahhh! We'll laugh and cry, it'll be fun, c'mon.
